Oh grow up already!

I am twenty-seven years and two months old, and I have never ever felt like a grownup.  
I actually cannot say that I'm too bothered by the fact that I live an extended adolescence, in spite of the fact that I live on my own, have a salaried job at a multi-national company, and do things like schedule vacations and drink alcohol.  Or, I should say, I haven't up to this point in my life been too bothered by it.  Now, all of a sudden, I hear the voice of the Sassy Gay Friend in my head, whining "look at your life, look at your choices," and I have no way to answer him.

Let me start by saying that I am fully capable of running my own life in a sustainable way, I just (for whatever reason) haven't seen fit to start doing that yet.  I have, however, expended a great deal of time and energy building for myself a professional EMPIRE here in Chicago, that I manage to run smoothly and on-budget as its own private LLC with its own federal ID number and bank account.  I work consistently and have a slew of strong contacts and a reputation in the theatre industry as an efficient, talented, easy-to-work-with writer and director.  I make careful, responsible professional decisions.  So why can't I apply this effective business model to my sloppy personal life?  I can.  I simply haven't.

My life is changing.
I have met the man I'm going to be with for at least the next 80 years (we're planning to renegotiate in AD 2090) and suddenly it is thrown into sharp relief that my choices have repercussions outside of myself.  I'm talking about making a life with another human being, and while I do bring to the table fabulous style, charm, biting wit, and flawless karaoke singing, I also bring with me credit card debt, some extra lbs, a lot of clutter, more clothes than anyone needs, bad food habits, and a general lack of consciousness as to where my money goes.  And that's no way to treat the best person that's ever happened to me.  There are definite things to work on here, to get myself in check, so that I can be the best conceivable version of Chelsea and a more enlightened life partner and citizen of the planet.

I started thinking these thoughts about growing up a few months ago, but the real inciting incidents for this life change were as follows:

1. Finally read Michael Pollan's In Defense of Food (every one of his books radically adjusts my headspace)
2. Finished up producing a 3-play cycle of original work AND completed the first of three oral surgeries this year, then took a good hard look at where that leaves me financially
3. Found myself eating a nasty piece of Sabarro pizza in the Orlando airport, feeling gross and irresponsible, and looked around thinking "I do not want this life.  Man did not fight his way up the evolutionary ladder to eat Sabarro pizza in a food court."

So what does this mean, practically?

It means that I herewith begin my evolution into a more enlightened, responsible, socially aware, and financially independent human being.  And this blog herewith takes the slant of chronicling my efforts in that direction (this will entail much more regular posting and pronounced tweaking of the original list).

My plan to evolve is four-prong:

1. Know what I'm supporting.  I get my groceries at Jewel Osco and Whole Foods.  I have cell phone coverage through AT&T.  I spend waaaay too much money on clothes from Anthropologie.  What do I know about the hiring practices of these agencies?  Where do they manufacture or obtain their products?  Who is in charge?  I know nothing about these organizations, and yet I keep them in business.  No more.  Every person to whom I regularly issue payment will henceforth be vetted, to the best of my ability.  It is my responsibility as a consumer in this society to know where my money goes, and to use my dollars to sustain companies that make a positive impact on my community.  I will be responsible.  I will be impactful.
2. Know what I'm eating.  I want to eat things made of food.  Nothing processed, nothing mystery, and nothing with any damn high fructose corn syrup, if I can friggin; help it.  The dissatisfaction that I have with my body (which is not high, but does exist) comes almost entirely from the fact that I all too often am a convenience eater, and do not prepare well enough to ensure I am on the path to an aware foodlife.  No more.  I am going to cook more and eat out less.  I am not going to buy food at the 7-11 anymore.  I will read the ingredients on every label, and put back "foods" that contain a laundry list of ingredients I can't pronounce.  My body was designed to eat food, and god help me, that's what I plan to feed it.  I will be whole.  I will be healthy.
3. Know what I'm buying.  I spend too much money.  I make plenty enough to live on, I've drafted budget after budget, but I lose all willpower inside a DSW.  No more.  I will evaluate what I own and come to terms with the fact that enough is enough.  Any future purchases will be well-thought-out and fill a void, not add to a heap.  I will get out of debt.  Once I am stable, I will no longer take money from my parents, except for occasions like birthdays and Christmas.  I will not succumb to the marketing targeted toward women that tells us we must have entirely new clothes, new shoes, new beauty products, and new perfume every month while the men in our lives save money for what they really need.  I will be conscientious.  I will be content.
4. Know what's going on.  I have been of voting age for almost a decade.  While I do vote, I am not nearly as informed as I should be of political and world events. There is no excuse for this, as the internet has made world news instantly and unceasingly available.  Why do I stay in the dark?  No more.  I will know what I am talking and voting about.  I will affect change because I will be knowledgeable enough to know where to put my weight, and how to create dialogue.  I will matter.  I will be informed.

So that's it.

That's what I'm feeling.

That's where I'm going, starting today (my mom's birthday.  Hi, Mama!)

I will use the internet, literature, and the advice of friends and mentors along the way.

And by Christmas 2011, I plan to be well on my way to being a real, live adult.